16 Oct How to Avoid Reckless Self-Sabotage
Congruence, the ability to stay in alignment with your goals, is essential.
It’s true about building your business, your body, or your relationships. In other words:
You know what to do. The problem is actually doing it.
Here’s a recent message from new Bach Performance online client, Dan:
“I know I shouldn’t have stopped for a Big Mac and fries, but I was short on time before my flight. As soon as I finished, I was disappointed, man.”
Dan is 36 years old, a former “active guy” who now spends most of his time working as a pharmaceutical sales rep. Dan knows he needs to eat less, lift weights, and move more if he wants to lose the gut that’s been piling on over the last two years.
He’s sick of letting himself down and beating himself up mentally.
He’s got an all or nothing personality, so one bad decision tends to lead others. It can take l two weeks for Dan to pull himself out of his self-sabotage tailspin.
We’ve both been in Dan’s shoes: knowing we need to make a change but still failing to do what’s necessary.
When we look back, we wonder: “Why didn’t I make this happen?”
I’m guilty, too.
Motivation wanes, and we end up making the same mistakes over and over.
Here’s a simple exercise Dan and I did to pull him out of his tailspin and get him on the fast-track to success. This activity works for my fitness and business clients. And it will work for you, too.
Define your “why.” We all want to look great naked, make more money, and be happy. But why does this matter to you?
Use the three “why’s” to get clear.
Ask: “How will losing 20 pounds improve my life?”
Answer: “I’ll feel better about myself.”
Ask: “How will feel feeling better about myself improve my life?”
Answer: I’ll be more confident at work, in the gym, and feel secure to ask women out on a date.”
Ask: “How will being more confident at work, in the gym, and in dating help?”
Answer: “I’ll be more successful at work, I’ll have more energy to keep working out, and I’ll find someone to settle down with.”
Sure, you might want big arms, visible abs, or more energy; but those goals alone aren’t enough to help you push through.
You must be clear on “why” these matter by knowing how they’ll improve your life.
Read Your “Why” Every Day
Every morning when you wake up, repeat your why. Life is crazy, and distractions are everywhere. We must keep our goals at the top of mind if we’re going to achieve them.
I told Dan to write his goal down every day and read it out loud when he gets out of bed.
In Dan’s case, it was “I will train and eat well today, so I’m more successful at work, have more energy, and have the confidence to date.” Sound cheesy? Maybe.
Build Delayed Gratification Into Your Day
Success in any area requires compromise in another. This means you’ll need to say “no” to short-term gratification and accept short-term inconvenience as the price for long-term success.
It’s difficult, no doubt, but controlling cravings and impulses is the number one trait of people who succeed in their business, body, and life. To get the job done, think of what you’re saying “no” to.
Here are a few examples:
I’m getting up early to start work because —> It will allow me to end work at 6:00 PM and spend time with friends and family
I’m working out today —> So I can have more energy later on.
I’m skipping a Big Mac—> So I can lose this gut in time for my Christmas beach vacation.
Building your best body or business comes back to being clear on your purpose, reinforcing the message, and delaying gratification.
Now, I want to hear from you. What are you struggling with?
Let’s talk about it on a call. Please book it here.